Tuesday, October 18, 2011

I Like to Rant

I realize it has been quite some time since my most recent post. I'll accredit my etymology class (or lack thereof) with this scandalous outrage, and will say nothing more on the subject.
I was taking a shower (okay, yes, it was a bath. What can I say? I love me some bathtime) and I found myself reflecting upon the new trend that is taking over our great country. It's being called the "wetlook" as I understand it and as you can see by the picture I've supplied to the left, it looks like you've just stepped out of the shower (bath) dripping wet, and threw some clothes on. Needless to say, I'm not a big fan of this one. To me, it's an excuse not to get ready in the morning (as are sweats, but that's a topic for a different day) and makes everyone look like a drowned wet. I know, as a suburban high schooler, I could never and would never rock this look, due to genetics and choice. And doesn't it dry after a while? What if you have nasty natural hair and go walking around with a Jewfro all day? It should be called the "Creepy Thin Man" look, because anyone who rocks it will just look like Crispin Glover.
But the undermining of this hideously unfortunate trend was not my intention when restarting my, as so affectionately referred to by myself, rant blog. I realized, in my nice hot bath, that hair in general is the most annoying thing to ever grow on one's body. It's a controversial issue, no doubt, because women love their hair, whether it be long, short, blonde, brown, ginger, black, sleek, curly, frizzy, etc., etc., you get the idea. However, when in the shower, hair becomes wet, and comes loose from the fragile bonds attaching it to our heads (I am currently an anatomy student and can tell you that the average person loses 90 hairs a day) and arranges itself all over our body. As a former diver, I have come to loathe wet hair, especially wet, chlorine-smelling hair, and one of my biggest pet peeves is wet hair that is stuck to my body. I find it all over, on my leg, my back, my shoulders, my neck, my arms, etc., as I'm sure everyone else does (all women at least, and men with long hair). But it's not just the hair on our heads I'm talking about. All women must agree bodily hairs are infuriating. We have to shave armpits, legs, some women shave arms, and various lady parts inappropriate for a high school blog. Not to mention, tweezing and waxing eyebrow hairs, lip hairs, annoying chin hairs or various hairs growing on our temples. Then there are mole hairs, maybe the most vile hairs of all. They stick out and make you look like a hag from a Grimm Brothers story. People will stare at you as you pass and whisper, "That is DEFINITELY not a beauty mark." We also have nose hairs that I'm guessing some men trim, and possibly ear hair, I don't know. All I know is that it is everywhere. And it's pissing me off.

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